Wednesday, February 11, 2009

I think I would like skydiving.

I used to wonder what my "boggart" is. That's Harry Potter language for "greatest fear." Conclusion: rejection.

That doesn't mean much for most people. Heck, everybody probably fears rejection, to some extent or another. But I approach it a bit differently.

I'm afraid I like risks. I like to throw myself out there, whether or not there's any surety that I'll live to see the end of it. There's this song that I love a whole lot about a guy who's girl leaves...and it's really confusing, actually, but a great song nonetheless. There's this line that goes, "My love, will you take my hand and run?" But the more brilliant part of the whole thing is that the song that precedes it on the album is called "So Afraid": Under my skin, I'm shaking and I can't get out. I am so afraid that I'll find myself alone...looking for a hope.

So obviously, I'm a thrill-seeker. I like those opportunities that scare the hell out of me and those people who are so darned intimidating because doesn't that make the successes all the sweeter? Veni, Vidi, Vici.

It's not always that way, of course. Sometimes it's downright devastating. Yes, with every failure, my confidence is shaken, I suppose, but never broken.

So this is my new motto:

Is it worth the risk?
Then risk it all.

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